15 June 2010

What's happening in Crazyville--Tuesday edition

We're starting to kick into wedding high gear here. I am starting to put my foot down about what I want. I told HTB I need addresses for his buddies, and I need him to pick a man from his side of the family to do a reading at the service. I'm trying to narrow down my "theme" for the reception. This has been a huge, dragged out FIGHT for months. My major frustration is hearing I'm supposed to make decisions and then, when I make them, family members feel the need to tell me that they don't like the choices I want. I won't go into details, but I got fussed at for wanting arrangements in white pumpkins for the reception. Which culminated a few weeks ago in my yelling, "Y'all can just plan the bleeping wedding yourselves. Pick whatever flowers you want, I don't want to hear about it, and I'll just show up, because I don't care anymore." I think that got some of the attention it needed to get, because they've backed off substantially. Except my mother, who, today, suggested hydrangeas. They don't match my colors, they won't be seasonal, and I don't want them--I chose not to argue this point at 8AM this morning, in her front yard. I want calla lilies. I know everyone means well, but, really, if I don't put my foot down, this is going to turn into a tacky mess. And I'm not having that. If I've had nightmares over this for all this time, I'm getting what I want. HTB got on me because I was watching "Bridezillas" on Sunday. He said it was bad mojo. I consider it taking notes.

In more peaceful news, I started two new projects this weekend. My mother bought CHS Visiting Bird two years ago, and asked me to stitch it for her. I pulled it out on Sunday. Now, it's not a freebie, but it's for her, and it's a fun stitch. I'm making good progress. HTB also brought me a lighthouse and asked me to stitch it for him, so I started that. It's an older Sanman freebie, By the Sea, from a newsletter, I think. I had to kit it up with my own colors, since the model used Seaside Treasures floss. I chose Anchor floss--the colors are bright and clean to me, and it will be pretty. It's pretty small, on 22 count Hardanger, so I'll finish it as a flat fold with some seagull fabric I have in my stash. I think it will be cute and summery, and he can display it where he wants.

I did work on my ring pillow, too. I spent all of Friday evening and most of Saturday on it. It should be done this week, at least that front panel, and the back shouldn't take that long. I decided that I want to try to find a clear, understated button for the front, and then put a knotwork one on the back. The back will probably be fairly simple (though HTB keeps pushing me to add beads--I think the man is moonlighting for Mill Hill. He wants beads on the lighthouse too. I refused), and some knotwork would look good back there, but putting a fancy button on the front would put it right over the edge into "too much." At least this is what my head says, the part that isn't concerned with being able to stuff it properly, LOL.

I hope I haven't driven anyone off with my maniacal rantings. I know that everything will work out right, it's just that it's a big task, and I don't want it to look wrong.


riona said...

Rachel: I turned my whole wedding over to my mother after one raging argument and I regret it to this day ... 38 years later. She made my wedding much bigger than I had wanted, excluding my friends and college classmates to include every first, second and third cousin of hers and my Dad's. I had one table of friends at the reception and a roomful of virtual strangers known mainlt to my parents and to Bill's parents. I never made up an album because their was no point at all at all! Of course, I was only 20 and finishing up my last year at college ... a bit preoccupied with my bachelor's thesis and my upcoming Oral exams in Literature ... so it was easier to wash my hands of the whole thing.

So do what YOU want ... it is YOUR day ... not your mother's. Don't let anyone live vicariously through you,!

April Mechelle said...

Stay away from Bridezillas!!! LOL
Do what you want! It is your wedding. Glad you have started new projects in stitching, maybe that will help you to relax. Happy Stitching!

LoneStar said...

Hang in there, gal! Just remember, if you are paying for your wedding, then you get to decide what goes. It's YOUR wedding.

When relatives get on your case, just smile sweetly and say, "Thank you for your suggestion. I'll give it proper priority," and then just ignore it and put it out of your mind.

Of course, after putting up with my own wedding plannings and well-meaning and annoying relatives over 22+ years ago, my advice for brides is to elope; spend the money for a longer honeymoon instead of the wedding! ;-)

Lisa (Texan)

Annie said...

I think these family wedding fights are par for the course. Just pick your battles wisely and I'm sure it will all work out well in the end!

Meari said...

I say it's your wedding and you should have what YOU want! Ugh, I don't envy your position but you should stand your ground.

Nick said...

Good for you for putting your foot down! It's your wedding, so you do what you want to do! Like you said, of course they mean well because I'm sure they are excited to be part of the planning process, but sometimes, as my dad would say, their can only be one chef in the kitchen!

Hope the new stitching can take your mind off of wedding planning for a little bit!

Julie M said...

What Rant? :)

Hang in there Rachel. This is a teeny tiny drop in the bucket of life and it will be over before you know it. In the mean time, put your foot down firmly and inform people that this is your wedding and you will do what you want. Period.

Enjoy your stitchy projects!

Terri(TerriBoog) said...

Your wedding should be what you want it to be. I love the Bridezilla note taking comment!!!

Vicky said...

Loved the post, you can never be as bad as those "brides" on bridezillas. Do you want to hear my suggestion for your flowers LOL

K-G Knitter said...

You keep yelling until you get what you want for your wedding! I worried too much about what other people wanted/needed, and ended up having a horrible wedding day. You decide what you want and what's most important to you, and tell everyone else to back off.

Meadows08 said...

The best advise is to remember that it is YOUR's and your HTB's wedding!

My hubby and I didn't cave to the things our parents wanted and had a wedding that we still talk about 15 years later.

Take care!

I do my thing and you do yours. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, then it is beautiful. If not, it can’t be helped--Frederick Perls